wedding gifts you really

MSN Money - Get the wedding gifts you really want MSN Home My MSN Hotmail Shopping Money People & Chat Sign In W eb Search: Money S earch MSN Money: Help Home News Banking Investing Planning Taxes My Money Portfolio Loans Insurance Planning Home Retirement Savings Insurance Family/College Resources Decision Centers Commentary Index More Tools Related Links My Accounts Message Boards Print-friendly version Send this to a friend Get market news by e-mail See if refinancing works Personal finance bookshelf Find It! Article Index Finance Q&A Tools Index Site map Related Sites Association of Bridal Consultants The Honeymoon Casa de Oro Travel wedding registry Honeymoonforyou.com HoneyLuna.com The Basics Get the wedding gifts you really want advertisement Traditional registries can prevent you from getting 5 identical bun warmers. But some couples really want camping gear, home down payments or honeymoon contributions. What would Miss Manners say? By MP Dunleavey It's relatively rare these days for people to get married right after graduating from college. The average age for first marriage among women has risen steadily to more than 25, from less than 21 in 1970; for men, the average is now more than 27. My fianc and I were about a decade or so past our mid-20s when we got married recently, and like a lot of people, we had accumulated a lot of stuff during our unmarried years. The last thing we wanted was more stuff. At least that's how we felt when we considered doing the standard newlywed thing: i.e. registering for china, linens, monogrammed silver, matching PDAs and a small, well-behaved child. Nah. What we wanted, more than anything, given the stress of modern wedding planning, was to go lie on a beach somewhere and pretend we were still happily dating. Don't let retirement sneak up on you. Create a perfect plan. But like most couples we found the cost of the wedding taxing enough -- even though our parents did pay for most of it. There was no way we could afford a honeymoon, too. So we got this crazy idea. If our loved ones would be willing to shell out for glassware and new pots, would it be terrible -- crass, rude, self-serving -- to ask for contributions toward what we really wanted? Financial wedding etiquette To be honest, I've never liked the idea of a traditional registry. No matter how fancy the store (or your china pattern), you're basically telling guests what to buy you. Miss Manners, aka Judith Martin, pointed out in a recent column that commercial gift registries used to be kept ONLY in the event that customers inquired about a bride's china or silver pattern. Now, she says, all sentiment is being stripped from the gift-giving tradition. People turn to registries, she says, "to put generosity under the control of its beneficiaries." And, she concludes sternly: "These practices are no less vulgar for having become commonplace." Her point is well-taken. Some couples seem to equate "getting married" with "shopping spree" and use the registry system to shamelessly upgrade every item in their home. On the other hand, there is a financial reality that cannot be avoided. Custom dictates that a gift must be bought, so for most people the financial sanity (and sheer convenience) of bridal registries outweighs the inherent crudeness of this system. Guests don't waste their money buying gifts couples don't want or can't use. Couples get what they need, so they don't have to buy it themselves. Stuff -- who needs it? Increasingly, says Peggy Post, author of "Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette by Peggy Post", many couples would rather skip the stuff anyway. "So many couples come to the marriage with so many things," she says, noting that 40% of marriages are "encore," i.e. repeat, unions, for one or both partners. "These days you see people registering for all kinds of non-traditional items." Among them: camping gear, a down payment for a house, stock certificates and, yes! . . . the honeymoon. According to the Association of Bridal Consultants (see link at left), a wedding guest will spend an average of $85 on a gift. The average cost of a honeymoon is about $4,000. If a couple has no need for flatware and linens, why not encourage guests to contribute to a honeymoon registry like thehoneymoon.com, casadeorotravel.com, honeymoonforyou.com or honeyluna.com? Guests can contribute to airfare, romantic dinners, massages, picnics, guided tours, etc. To drool over a sample registry for a honeymoon in Hawaii, click on the link at left under Honeymoonforyou.com. For one in Greece, click at left under HoneyLuna.com. And to send in contributions for my honeymoon, click . . . oh, never mind. The etiquette of alternative registries Peggy Post, the great-granddaughter-in-law of Emily Post, thinks using these offbeat registries can be fine "with a big IF attached." Here's some guidance: 1) Wait until you're asked. It's impolite (and annoying) to include a card announcing where you're registered. Wait for guests to inquire, and let the word spread discreetly through friends and family. "Let your parents, siblings, wedding party and close friends know -- IF they've asked," suggests Bobbie Izeman, a bridal consultant and advice columnist for blushing-brides.com. "But don't announce it in a formal way." 2) Do not dictate. As Miss Manners points out, a gift, above all, is a gift. It is not up to you to decide what your guests should give, no matter how badly you want contributions to your down payment, help with your airfare or even traditional items like cookware. "You should leave your guests the option to give you what they want," agrees Post. 3) Say thank you. It may seem obvious, but sending a prompt, enthusiastic thank you note -- for every gift, no matter what the gift -- is essential. "The key thing is to remember to be appreciative," says Post. The honeymoon fund Since we didn't know about these honeymoon registries a few months ago, my fianc and I set up our own impromptu "honeymoon fund." We made a small gaffe by alluding to it in the instruction sheet for our weekend wedding (oops!), but it was in the context of asking guests please not to give presents. Apparently, that is also a faux pas (eek!), but we hadn't consulted all these etiquette experts then. To our surprise, a small number of friends (and a couple of relatives) protested. They wanted to get us A Real Gift. I can say with some relief that at least we handled that properly -- encouraging people to give whatever sort of gift they wanted. And they did. We got a lovely mix of gifts and honeymoon fund contributions. Just enough so that we can restore our sanity on some sandy shore -- without going into a penny of debt. What greater wedding gift could there be? Editor's Choice 3 legal papers you can't live without Your own business, your tax shelter Brush: The 5 most overpaid CEOs Are seniors gambling away retirement? Cut your taxes by going solar Readers' Choice Ratings Top 5 Articles 9.34 Zombie debt collectors dig up your old mistakes 9.33 10 ways to stop identity theft cold 9.31 10 ways to avoid outrageous hospital overcharges 9.22 The tricks and traps of debt consolidation 9.17 Safeguard your Social Security number View all top rated articles More Resources · E-mail us your comments on this article · Post on the Your Money message board · Get a daily dose of market news S earch MSN Money tips advertisement MSN Money's editorial goal is to provide a forum for personal finance and investment ideas. Our articles, columns, message board posts and other features should not be construed as investment advice, nor does their appearance imply an endorsement by Microsoft of any specific security or trading strategy. An investor's best course of action must be based on individual circumstances. © 2005 Microsoft MSN Privacy Legal Advertise Feedback Help

Shower Gifts Decorations &

4 Showers.com -Bridal Showers & Baby Showers - Favors, Games, Gifts, Decorations & Supplies Home Shopping Party Planning View Cart Help Contact Us Customer Comments Back Your one stop shower shop offering everything needed to plan the perfect bridal or baby shower. Bridal Shower Bridal Shower Favors Bridal Shower Gifts Decorations & Supplies Bridal Shower Games Budget Favors Party Planning Tips Baby Shower Baby Shower Favors Baby Shower Gifts Decorations & Supplies Baby Shower Games Budget Favors Pregnancy Products Party Planning Tips Check out our current half price bridal specials ! Check out our current half price baby specials ! Check out the adorable favors , unique gifts , great party planning tips and beautiful decorations and supplies , all delivered conveniently to your door . Enter Keywords Newlywed Kitchen Combo Bride and groom oven mitts really get things cooking in the kitchen! Stir up some smiles with this fun novelty item. More Info Personalized Bridal Tea Favor with Caddy Personalized tea bag available in five attractive designs, topped off with a porcelain teapot-shaped caddy. More Info Celestial Bridal Shower Favor Give your guests the gift of relaxation with these heavenly bath beads. They'll be singing "Twinkle, Twinkle, little sun, moon, and stars." More Info Bridal Shower Rolling Pin Recipe Card Holder Sheer delight and practicality all "rolled up" into one! Homespun, vintage-inspired, real wooden "rolling pin" is actually a convenient recipe card holder. More Info Shades of Autumn Leaf Soap Petals Fall in love with our vibrant Leaf Soap Petals, which come in all the shades of autumn: burgundy, gold, orange, and green. More Info Cheers to a Great Combination Two hearts, one amazing future. This combination is as perfectly suited to each other as the bride and groom. Included is one chrome Heart Shaped Bottle Stopper and one chrome Tuxedo Heart Corkscrew in whimsical packaging. More Info Daddy Tool Belt Having a baby is a two person endeavor, and there's no need to wonder about what to get Daddy. Tools of the trade diaper changing tool belt is filled with all the necessities for changing baby. More Info Noah's Ark Magnet Favor Everybody loves and uses magnets, and these colorful 2.5" resin magnets are available in three assorted styles. More Info Baby Shower Rolling Pin Recipe Card Holder Sheer delight and practicality all "rolled up" into one! Homespun, vintage-inspired, real wooden "rolling pin" is actually a convenient recipe card holder. More Info Lucky Ducky Favor Charm and delight your guests with this darling duck-shaped soap. More Info Personalized Baby Shower Tea Favor with Caddy Personalized tea bag available in four baby shower designs, topped off with a porcelain teapot shaped caddy. More Info Labor Day Pamper Pack Surprise your favorite Mommy-to-be with the gift of tranquillity on the one day she'll really need it! Delivery day will be even more special with this tote bag of goodies to help her feel pampered. More Info Baby Shower: Favors | Gifts | Decorations & Supplies | Games | Budget Favors | Pregnancy Products Bridal Shower: Favors | Gifts | Decorations & Supplies | Games | Budget Favors Home | Shopping | Party Planning | View Cart | Help | Contact Us | Links | Back 4 Showers.com, A Division of The Rosemary Company, 2000 - 2005 This site designed by Fox Web Design Please direct all questions and comments to the Webmaster

Creative Gifts Pray SIM's

-- -- give online site map contact SIM Do you need hope? Get Involved Now -- Creative Gifts Did you know that you can give things like a used car or computer to help world missions? Well, you can! SIM is prepared to receive “gifts in kind,” which simply means non-monetary gifts. These gifts are then turned into practical results for world missions. Here are a few ideas: Computers or computer-related equipment may be valuable to our SIM-TEC team. Please send an email to SIM-TEC.EquipmentConsultant@sim.org or visit our SIM-TEC website . Your postage stamps can be mailed to Derek Porter at 4114 Nigeria Road, Sebring, FL 33875 or SIM New Zealand at P.O. BOX 38 588, Howick, NZ. These stamps are sold and the money given to SIM ministries. United States farmers or ranchers may give a crop or livestock towards advancing world missions. You may also sponsor a crop or livestock and profits from their sale will go towards a SIM ministry. Please contact Dennis Maloney at 918-285-0410 for more information or view the website of Steer, Inc. . Medical or dental equipment and supplies may be donated through your nearest SIM sending office . Please contact the SIM office before sending your gift. Investments such as appreciated stocks, mutual funds, or real estate may also become a gift to SIM, eligible for charitable income tax deduction in the United States. Please contact your nearest SIM Sending Office for more details. For any other product donation or creative giving opportunities, please contact your nearest SIM Sending Office . SIM is not able to accept all types of non-monetary gifts, but only those for which there is an existing need. So please contact us first to discuss if your gift could meet a need in world missions. We look forward to hearing from you! "We always pray for you, and we give thanks to God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, for we have heard that you trust in Christ Jesus and that you love all of God's people. You do this because you are looking forward to the joys of heaven - as you have been ever since you first heard the truth of the Good News. This same Good News that came to you is going out all over the world. It is changing lives everywhere, just as it changed yours that very first day you heard and understood the truth about God's great kindness to sinners." Colossians 1:3-6 NLT -- 2005 SIM International, 1995-2005 All rights reserved. 1838 Gold Hill Road, Fort Mill, SC 29708 Tel: 1(803)802-7300 WebTalk@sim.org About SIM Our Purpose Core Values We Believe SIM FAQ Qualifications For Service Mission Issues SIM Magazine Contact SIM Sending Offices SIM Missionaries Africa ▶ Asia ▶ South America ▶ International Sending Offices Angola Benin Botswana Burkina Faso Central African Rep. Cote d'Ivoire Eritrea Ethiopia Ghana Guinea Kenya Liberia Madagascar Malawi Mauritius Mozambique Namibia Niger Nigeria Reunion Senegal South Africa Sudan Tanzania Togo Zambia Zimbabwe Asia Creative Opportunities Bangladesh China India Mongolia Nepal Pakistan Philippines International Sending Offices Bolivia Chile Ecuador Paraguay Peru Uruguay African People Groups ▶ Asian People Groups ▶ South American People Groups ▶ Arsi Awi Banna Borana Daasanach Dagomba Djoula Fon Fulani Gumuz Hausa Herero Kotokoli Lomwe Makhuwa Mamprusi Maninka Mursi San Sisaala (Sissala) Sola (Sorouba) Som*ali Songhai Tamajaq Toubou Wodaabe Wolof Yao Bengali Uyghurs Aymara Guarani Mapuche Quechua Business and Administration Children and Youth Education Evangelism & Church Growth Health Human Need/AIDS Literacy & Translation Media & Arts Short Term Assignment & Internship Teams Technical Services Theological Education GO›Opportunities Enquire Online Qualifications For Service Projects Give Online Gift Catalog Creative Gifts Pray SIM's Online Store SIM Magazine Sending Offices Contact SIM SIM Related Websites Language Sites Link With Us Site Map