gifts for women. At
|
|
My Word's Worth - choosing gifts for women My Word's Worth: a weekly column by Marylaine Block vol. 3 #21, November 21, 1997 ADVICE FOR DESPERATE MEN The XTC song "The World's Full of Angry Young Men" is running through my head, but the words attached to the music are "The mall's full of desperate men." As it gets closer to Christmas, the population of the mall starts changing. Early on women and teenagers predominate, but over time, there are more and more lost-looking men with that deer-caught-in-the-headlights inward-looking stare--the natural prey of eager shopkeepers who know they can sell these men absolutely anything. The problem is, of course, that when the world's tasks got divvied up by genders, women got to be the gift-givers. By and large this works out quite nicely -- at least until men need to find gifts for women. At this point, many of you are utterly clueless. You sense that whatever you give is freighted with symbolic meaning, but you have no idea what that meaning IS. You strongly suspect this is one of those little tests women put men through that you can't possibly win -- give us nothing at all, and be forever written off as insensitive dolts, or give us the wrong things and be forever written off as insensitive dolts. But we're not actually all THAT hard to please. Here are a few hints. Part of the symbolic value is that you remembered at all. So even if you screw up and select something fairly hopeless (crotchless panties are generally a mistake), we WILL give you credit for trying. After all, we have years of practice thanking little boys who give us footballs for our birthdays -- we understand that he thinks this is the finest gift anyone could ever receive. The malls are trying to sell you stuff for generic females, jewelry and perfume and nice-smelling expensive soaps and moisturizers and such, but she is NOT generic. She is a specific person with specific tastes that, yes, you should have noticed by now (and if you haven't, start looking at her closely). Don't buy earrings for her if you can't remember seeing her wearing earrings. If she does, does she like discreet little buttons, or splashy dangling ones? Show her that you pay attention to her unique interests and preferences. For example, my only real concession to feminine stuff is pretty scarves, fastened with a cat pin; anyone who gave me either a scarf or a cat pin would know that the gift will be appreciated on two levels: I'll wear it and enjoy it, and I'll be pleased that you paid attention to what I like. A gift should also indicate that you pay attention to what she says, or cares about. If she's a save-the-whales sort of person, a little gold whale charm on a chain would be a delightful present. If she couldn't stop looking at the Degas ballerina in the art museum, check out the art museum gift shop for an inexpensive print, or even Degas notecards. Did she cry her way through The Little Mermaid ? You could get her a video of it. Is she never quite warm enough? How about a pretty crocheted shawl to drape around her shoulders? Does she adore Andrew Lloyd Webber? There must be a production of his playing somewhere that you can take her to. A gift doesn't need to be expensive if it conveys the basic message, "I know who you are and I love that in you." Avoid vacuum cleaners and toaster-ovens and sewing machines, no matter how much she may actually need one. What we want is permission to stop being efficient and hardworking for a while and simply feel treasured. (Even the most competent women want to feel protected and taken care of by their menfolk.) If you're a man who understands what clothes look good on her, and you know what size she wears, you can buy her a great outfit. The implied message is "You're a damn good-looking woman, and I love to see you looking well-turned out." Of course, if, like my son, you think an orange shirt with red shorts is a nifty combination, you should avoid this route. One of the nicest gifts is your time. Arrange for someone else to take care of the kids, and take her off somewhere where you can pay uninterrupted attention to her, and she to you. There aren't enough hours in the day for us to do our work, take care of the kids, take care of our own needs, and still keep a relationship fresh. Give her time off from responsibilities and routine, and use the time to renew the romance. And whatever else you give her, add the gift of words. Tell her why you chose it specially for her. You wouldn't believe what a sucker we are for words like "This was so elegant it made me think of you," or "It reminded me of the music we danced to on our first date." If you could live your life again and you'd still fall in love with her, tell her that. Better yet, tell her that in writing. There's a reason we keep old love letters and mementos -- it's so we can read them over and over again when times are tough, and we're not getting through to each other, and we're trying to remember why it was we wanted the relationship to keep going. So go ahead, guys. Venture out into the cold and brave the alien territory of the shopping malls and exquisite little boutiques. All you have to do is remember who she is and what you love about her and what she cares about (besides you). Remember: Earth girls are easy. You get points for trying. And with these helpful hints in mind, you might pass the test this time around. Heck, you might even get an A. My Word's Worth Archive Current column Marylaine.com/ home to all my other writing NOTE: My thinking is always a work in progress. You could mentally insert all my columns in between these two sentences: "This is something I've been thinking about," and "Does this make any sense to you?" I welcome your thoughts. Please send your comments about these columns to: marylaine at netexpress.net. Since I've written a lot of these, some of them many years ago, help me out by telling me which column you're referring to. I'll write columns here whenever I really want to share an idea with you and can find time to write them . If you want to be notified when a new one is up, send me an e-mail and include "My Word's Worth" in the subject line.
Unique Gifts Games Arts
Unique Gift Ideas, Jigsaw Puzzles & Speciality Toys Clever gifts, unique games, unusual toys and original puzzles. My Shopping Cart, 0 Items Home Unique Gifts Games Arts and Crafts Kids Puzzles Clearance Search keyword / item #: UNIQUE GIFTS Exclusive Gifts For the perfect party For Your Pet Only available here Halloween Fun Shop Gifts under $10 Best Sellers New On Sale Gag Gifts Collegiate Back to School Nostalgic VHS/DVD Collections Personalized Rest and Relaxation Licensed Products Gadgets For the Home For Kids For Her For Him GAMES ARTS AND CRAFTS KIDS PUZZLES CLEARANCE ONLINE SPECIALS GUARANTEED LOWEST PRICE ONLINE EXCLUSIVES SALE NEW PRODUCTS Home > Unique Gifts | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Next NEW! Farting Toilet Paper Cover Truly tasteless fun: pull the paper and let one rip! Drips Of Blood, Set of 4,18X11Sheet Add gory dripping "blood" to any wall or window, indoors or out. RCA Lawton Turntable Bye-bye boring stereo-in-a-box. Hello vintage-look RCA Victrola with modern technology, including CD! $14.95 $19.95 $299.95 In Stock In Stock In Stock NEW! NEW! Pepsi Vending Machine Personal soda machine lets you enjoy an ice-cold drink whenever you want! Chaos Tower Build perpetual motion towers up to 6 feet high! Flying Witch Scary witch comes to life as it flies across your lawn! $199.95 $139.95 $29.95 In Stock In Stock In Stock NEW! 12-in-1 Wooden Game Table Our amazing 12-in-1 cherry finished wood game table fits any decor, entertains the whole family, looks great! Personalized Tavern Beer Glasses These personalized beer glasses make the perfect thirst-quenching gift! Fold A Hoop Indoor Game Shoot a game of hoops indoors, then fold it up and hide it away. $199.95 $49.95 $199.95 In Stock In Stock In Stock 1 to 9 of 407 items | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Next Track Your Order | Customer Service | About Us | My Account | My Shopping Cart Privacy Policy | Shipping Costs & Times | Affiliate Program | Site Map © 2004 Spilsbury © 2004 Spilsbury --
Great Gifts & Toys
Listmania! Beyond Barbie, Bratz & Dora: Great Gifts & Toys for Girls Your Store See All 31 Product Categories Your Account | Cart | Wish List | Help Improve Your Recommendations | Your Amazon Home | Your Profile | Learn More Search Amazon.com Books Popular Music Music Downloads Classical Music DVD VHS Apparel Yellow Pages Restaurants Movie Showtimes Toys Baby Computers Video Games Electronics Camera & Photo Software Tools & Hardware Office Products Magazines Sports & Outdoors Outdoor Living Kitchen Jewelry & Watches Beauty Gourmet Food Beta Musical Instruments Health/Personal Care Travel Cell Phones & Service Outlet Auctions zShops Everything Else Scientific Supplies Medical Supplies Indust. Supplies Automotive Home Furnishings Lifestyle Pet Toys Arts & Hobbies Web Search Listmania! Beyond Barbie, Bratz & Dora: Great Gifts & Toys for Girls by The Macko Family , Blessed with Great Girls E-mail this list to a friend 1. Animal Planet Rescue Air Ambulance (Toy) Availability: This item is currently not available. Customers also shopped for these similar items . The Macko Family's comments: Features a female veteranarian who flies a helicopter and rescues animals in distress. 2. Pizza Party: Wooden Pizza Set by Melissa & Doug (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Imaginarium Buy new : $19.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Melissa & Doug offer some of the best products out there. Whether you choose the Pizza Party, Cake Cutting Set or Food Cutting Box, you can't go wrong. 3. Barrel of Crafts by Chenille Kraft (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Toys"R"Us Buy new : $29.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: For girls who are preschool to kindergarten age, this bucket of crafts provides tons of items with which your artist can explore. 4. HUMONGOUS Freddi Fish 4-5 ( Windows ) by Humongous (Video Game) Availability: Currently unavailable Used & new from $2.50 The Macko Family's comments: Freddi Fish is a great problem-solving game. We love these along with the Putt-Putt series. 5. Deluxe Multi-level Wooden Folding Castle with 3 Figures and Horse by Melissa & Doug (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Imaginarium Buy new : $69.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Playsets in any form are a great gift. This one is perfect for little girls who are fascinated with fairy princesses. 6. Castle Dolls 8-piece Play Set in a Wooden Storage Case by Melissa & Doug (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Imaginarium Buy new : $19.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: This set of dolls make a great accompaniment to the castle playset. 7. Loving Family Sweet Sounds Dollhouse by Fisher-Price (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Toys"R"Us Buy new : $79.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: A dollhouse still is a must have for any little girl. However, feel free to skip the electronic version and have your little one use her imagination. 8. Butterfly Garden Kitchen Center by Imaginarium (Toy) Availability: This item is currently not available. Customers also shopped for these similar items . The Macko Family's comments: Like the dollhouse, a kitchen with the appropriate pans are still a must have for any little girl. However, feel free to skip the electronic version and have your little one use her imagination. 9. Cranium Hullabaloo Game by Cranium (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Toys"R"Us List Price: $24.99 Buy new : $19.99 You Save : $5.00 (20%) Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Get the sillies out with this great listening game. 10. Lace-a-Puppet by Lauri (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Imaginarium Buy new : $12.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Great for fine-motor skills, you can make and decorate these puppets with your little one. 11. Play Doh Barrel by Hasbro (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Toys"R"Us Buy new : $12.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: This set includes all of the essentials you need to start a great playdough set. 12. Animal Planet Farm Set by Toys "R" Us (Toy) Availability: This item is currently not available. The Macko Family's comments: Plastic animals are one of thos things that we never think to buy, but when someone gives them to us, we discover why they are a staple in every classroom. 13. Lego Explore Farm by LEGO Systems, Inc (Toy) Availability: This item is currently not available. The Macko Family's comments: These animals along with the basic duplo set offer hours of creative fun. 14. Animal Alley Darby Dog Vet Kit by Toys "R" Us (Toy) Offered by: Toys"R"Us Buy new : $19.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: This set is a two in one as you get all of the elements of a dr. kit along with the vet kit. 15. Lego Duplo 140-pc. Bulk Tub (5352) by LEGO Systems, Inc (Toy) Offered by: Toys"R"Us List Price: $19.99 Buy new : $18.99 You Save : $1.00 ( 5%) Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: This basic duplo set along with the farm animals offer hours of creative fun 16. Magnetic Dress Up by Melissa & Doug (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Imaginarium Buy new : $19.99 Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Remember the paper dolls of yesteryear? They've been upgrades and trust me, this magnetic set will get tons of use! 17. Floor Standing Theatre by Alex (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Imaginarium List Price: $89.99 Buy new : $79.99 You Save : $10.00 (11%) Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Think outside the box! This theater can be used for puppets, to sell lemonade, or to issue train tickets or movie tickets. 18. Bean Bag Toss by Melissa & Doug (Toy) Offered by: Imaginarium List Price: $29.99 Buy new : $19.98 You Save : $10.01 (33%) Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: Great for hand-eye coordination, this game will provide lots of fun for wet or snowy days. 19. Story Book Reader with Lion King Book by Publications International (Toy) Average Customer Review: Offered by: Toys"R"Us List Price: $24.99 Buy new : $19.99 You Save : $5.00 (20%) Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours The Macko Family's comments: This story reader and an assortment of the accompanying packs have kept our daughters busy for hours. Create your own list! See the Best Lists Top 100 Listmania lists Search Listmania lists More about The Macko Family Related Listmania! Add your list My Children's Favorite "Melissa & Doug" toys... : A list by Mile High Blondie, Kids tested & I approved... BEST NONGADGETY Toys For My Preschooler : A list by katiesmom79413, Child Development Specialist Toys & books for a 2.5 year old girl : A list by Umabelly, Mother Quality Items For Your Child's Play Kitchen : A list by PortofinoGirl, Stocking My Daughter's Kitchen Add your list Related So You'd Like to... Create a guide Discover a Few More of the Fairies Favorite Things : A guide by J. H. Sweet, author of The Fairy Chronicles Discover Fairy Recommended Arts & Crafts : A guide by J. H. Sweet, author of The Fairy Chronicles Keep an energetic two year old busy all day : A guide by Jennifer A. Boutell, Mom of two year old and newborn have the best preschool board games... : A guide by KNSudha, Toyaholic Mom :-) Enjoy a Second Childhood : A guide by J. H. Sweet, author of The Fairy Chronicles provide outstanding learning opportunities to children : A guide by Brandy Gayle Humphrey Lee, Licensed Home Childcare Provider get ideas on what to buy a girl 1-3 yrs : A guide by M. E Flanagan-Paull, Kyrsten's Mommy & Frequent Play Group Attendee What to buy for 3 year old boy who has everything : A guide by Michelle Bailey, Mom of 2 boys ages 1 and 3 who lives in a small house Create a guide Where's My Stuff? • Track your recent orders . • View or change your orders in Your Account . Shipping & Returns • See our shipping rates & policies . • Return an item (here's our Returns Policy ). Need Help? • Forgot your password? Click here . • Redeem or buy a gift certificate. • Visit our Help department . Search All Products Books Popular Music Music Downloads Classical Music DVD VHS Apparel Yellow Pages Restaurants Movie Showtimes Toys Baby Computers Video Games Electronics Camera & Photo Software Tools & Hardware Office Products Magazines Sports & Outdoors Outdoor Living Kitchen Jewelry & Watches Beauty Gourmet Food Beta Musical Instruments Health/Personal Care Pet Supplies Travel Books Cell Phones & Service Outlet Auctions zShops Everything Else Scientific Supplies Medical Supplies Indust. Supplies Automotive Home Furnishings Lifestyle Arts & Hobbies for Top of Page Amazon.com Home | Directory of All Stores Our International Sites: Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | Japan | France | China Contact Us | Help | Shopping Cart | Your Account | Sell Items | 1-Click Settings Investor Relations | Press Releases | Careers Conditions of Use | Privacy Notice © 1995-2005, Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates
Gift Ideas !! Text
Affectionately Yours Wedding Boutique & Gift Gallery Wedding Boutique & Gift Gallery Looking For A Gift For A Special Someone ? Caketops Hundreds Of Styles To Choose From For Life's Special Occasions. From Medieval To Dolphins To Western, And Everything In-Between Toasting Sets Every Design Imaginable From Pewter Theme Chalices to Economy Styles Ring Pillows Pillows Of Every Shape & Color For The Littlest Member of the Wedding Party Unity Candles Calla Lilies, Victorian, Roses, Doves & Many Other Gorgeous Styles...Including A Large Selection Of Beautiful Unity Holder Sets Favors & Miscellaneous Favor Frames, Decorative Favors, Guestbooks & Pens, Flower Girl Baskets, Parasols, Centerpieces, Guest Cameras & Much More !! Cake Server Sets Gorgeous Styles That Include Doves, Hearts, Dolphins, Dragons, Fairies & Many Many More !! Thank You Cards For That All Important "Thank You" To Your Guests. Styles Include Many Attractive Photo & Non-Photo Designs Photo Wedding Albums Studio Quality Wedding Albums For Those Precious Photographs. Many Styles Include Proof Albums, Large Bridal Albums & Parent Albums Tiaras & Crowns Rhinestones, Pearls & Crystals !! Wedding Jewelry Stunningly Beautiful !! Some Great Attendant Gift Ideas !! Text to Search For: -- Helpful Departments Invitation/Stationary Wording Wedding Planning Tips Wedding Cake Starter Ideas Reception Song Suggestions For The Bride & Her Dad Bride & Her Brother Groom & His Mom Bouquet Flower Meanings Wedding Party Responsibilities Wedding Planning Timeline Recipe for a Successful Marriage Anniversary Gift Suggestions Resources For The Bride & Groom Wide Array Of Memorable Gifts For The Wedding Couple. Make Your Gift Something They Will Remember ! Attendant Gifts Many Wonderful Ways To Say "Thank You" To Wonderful Friends Anniversary Accessories Everything You Need For Celebrating That Memorable Anniversary Party Special Event Candles Keepsake Candles For Birthdays, Births, Baptism & First Communions Ceremony/Reception Music Music CD Collections To Make Your Wedding Memorable. Song for my Son/Daughter & Much Much More Fantasy Collectibles Dragons, Unicorns, Pegasus, Gargoyles & Much More ! Gorgeous Collectibles That Deserve Top Shelf In Your Curio Crystal Giftware Quality Crystal Items That Make Wonderful Gifts Even If The Gift Is For Yourself Photo Greeting Cards Why Not Share Family Photos For Special Events & At Christmastime With These Attractive Photo Card Designs Discontinued Items Reduced Prices For Quick Sale Start A New Wedding Tradition Showcase A Real Conversation Piece On Your Cake. Show Your Friends & Family Just What Individuals You Really Are !! Hundreds Of Styles To Choose From... Click Here To Find Out More Wedding Accessory Collections Medieval/Fairytale Western Hydrangea Forever Friends Seaside Dolphins Victorian Butterflies Callas Daisies Doves Linked Hearts Other Collections Rhinestone & Satin Lilac Mist Pearl Overlay With All My Heart Pearl Satin Grand Impressions Yours Truly Sparkling Adoration Dazzling Romance Chocolate Kiss Enchanting Moments Ivory Enchanting Moments White Nature's Beauty Tender Embrace Memorable Treasures Touched by Love Western Affection Celtic Everlasting Love It's All About LOVE Cross My Heart Romance Blooms Sheer Emotion Blue Classic Touch White Classic Touch Eternal Vows One True Love Butterfly Kisses This Site Last Updated - 9 / 22 / 2005 Planning A Wedding ?? Receive Your FREE Copy Of The Wedding Guide From Your Area Boston San Francisco Go To Best Bridal-! Top100biz.com Listed in the BridalClicks Wedding & Bridal Search Engine List Join Next 5 Report Support Freedom Yellow Ribbon Support Next / List / Join Hair Boutique Hundreds of hair care tips for every occasion including weddings & formal parties. Gallery of over 800 different hairstyles. Site is updated daily. Castles on the Web Offers an extensive database of links to all things Castle related! Wedding Favors by Serendipity Elegant plantable favors, "perfect pair" pear candles, personalized candle favors, themed favors, place card holders, place frames, wine stoppers, chocolate covered strawberries and much more... Wedd Webb Design A custom wedding website for today's bride and groom. Wedding web design featuring free 10 day trial, online RSVP, registry, photo gallery, and more. Relaxations Home Page Specailizing in High Quality Spa and Beauty Products. Check site often as our FREE health and beauty tips change weekly. #1 Intimate Bath & Body Discover Bath & Body Intimacy for your Spirit & Soul. Free Relaxation Secrets Report. Beautifully handcrafted products include party favors, wedding and baby shower kits, natural soap, bath salts & bombs, scented candles, massage oil, skin care, gift sets, etc. Wedding Day Originals - A Unique Modern Alternative Unique, modern, alternative wedding and bridal ideas. Featuring Crystal Bridal Bouquets and Accessories. Exquisitely hand crafted, or make them on your own with do-it-yourself kits. The Wedding Planner An A to Z directory of wedding related sites. One stop wedding planning. All About Wedding Planning Member of AllWeddingCompanies.com Weddings and Wedding Planning Professional DJ Services In The Greater Boston Area NEW! Learn how to bring FREE, targetted TRAFFIC to your Web site with WebPosition Gold (tm). Get your FREE trial here! Wedding Invitations Bridal Shower Invitations Save The Date Cards A Romantics Network Partner Listed in the BridalClicks Wedding & Bridal Search Engine Just-Wedding-links.com Portal for Weddings This Moms In Business Net Ring is owned by Affectionately Yours Wedding Boutique & Gift Gallery . [ Join this Ring | Next Site | Previous Site | List Sites ] ~ Member of Carousel Mall ~ Shop at home for products and services on the WWW. NEXT SITE | SKIP 1 | NEXT 5 | JOIN | MAIN ENTRANCE Sponsored by: This UltimateWedding.com Link Exchange site is owned by Affectionately Yours Wedding & Gift Boutique Click here for Previous | Next Random | List Sites Join this Webring Today! Visit our discussion boards! Member of WindowShopping , The International Marketplace for Independent OnLineRetailers. This site is a member of WebRing. To browse visit here . This WAHM.com Web Ring site is owned by Dawn Gemme . Want to join the Work At Home Moms Web Ring ? [ Skip Prev ] [ Prev ] [ Next ] [ Skip Next ] [ Random ] [ Next 5 ] [ List Sites ]
shower gift Wedding Gift
Berkeley Parents Network: Gifts for Weddings and Wedding Showers Berkeley Parents Network Home Members Post a Msg Reviews Advice Join BPN Help/FAQ What's New Search Gifts for Weddings and Wedding Showers Berkeley Parents Network Advice Holidays and Special Events Weddings Gifts Wedding Gift Suggestions What to give as a shower gift Wedding Gift Suggestions Help! I have a good friend getting married in TWO weeks and I need to find her a great wedding gift. Am thinking of a bread-making machine. Does anyone know of a good brand as well as a store that carries them? I bought one once from Bed and Bath (under $70!) but they don't seem to carry them anymore. Thanks! Naomi Recommendations for bread machines: http://parents.berkeley.edu/recommend/where2buy/breadmachine.html I can't provide advice about the breadmaking machine but would like to tell you that the one wedding gift we have found most useful over the years was a pair of binoculars (ours are Baush and Lomb and sport-size, not clunky with excellent optics). We've used them a lot at sporting events(baseball/football games) and on hikes. In recent years they have come in handy on walks with children, bird/animal watching at the house, at the beach, etc. By far we have used them more than the relish dishes, fine china or other various and sundry machines received(with possible exception of the rice cooker which we use a lot.) As you consider a gift for you friend think about the things they enjoy doing together--one friend of mine registered for camping gear. The happy couple received tent, "Sunshower" portable water bag/with shower attachment, camp stove and one of those small gas Weber barbeques (about $60) which doesn't require the charcoal and noxious lighter fluid, can be used at a moments notice, is also portable! Hope this helps...Good luck! Mary Have you considered giving your friend a wedding commemorative plate? As a "hobbyist" ceramic painter, I have done several of these for friends who have gotten married, and they love them. Jessica Abbott, who owns Brushstrokes Studio (a paint-it-yourself studio) in N. Berkeley (510-528-1360), will paint one for you if you don't feel confident enough to do one on your own (I think she charges about $75), and she can do just about any style you want. (She has some samples on the wall of the studio if you'd like to take a look.) Jessica will put the name of the couple and the wedding date on the plate for you, but I have also seen people put special messages on them. I think a handmade gift is wonderful, and your friend could enjoy it for years to come. Sarah Our favorite wedding gift (which we first received, and have given several times since) is a well-stocked picnic basket. Shops like Pier 1 and Cost Plus sell all sorts of baskets which you can fill with any number of goodies -- place settings, of course, but also acrylic wine glasses, a jelly jar with a votive inside, a checkered blanket or tablecloth, a CD of romantic or classical music, a bottle of champagne, cheeses, crackers, dried fruits... Especially if the couple are close friends, I prefer something creative and personal like this over picking from a registry. Loralee I recently remarried, and my husband and I had both been running householdsfor a while, so we weren't "starting from scratch" and already had mostof the basics. Here are some weddinggifts that we really liked and still enjoy after 3 years:a beautiful "throw" for the sofa, a serving platter forThanksgiving dinners, dinner for 2 at Bay Wolf restaurant, crystal wine glasses. What to give as a shower gift August 2003 I've been invited to a bridal shower and am lost as to what togive. I've looked on the web site which has recommended weddinggifts, but those are more for the couple, as opposed to thebride. In fact I've never been to a bridal shower before andalmost wonder if we're supposed to give ''racy'' gifts such aslingere -- I don't know the bride that well and don't feelcomfortable doing this. Are there other traditional orappropriate gifts to give at this occasion?Bobbie When in doubt, bath & body stuff from Body Time or the Body Shop is always a great gift. Another idea; a gift certificate to a nice restaurant for the happy couple (most places sell them). anon I received several (mostly white) pieces of lingerie at my engagement party several years ago- nothing too racy as they were gifts from my parents' friends. I had 2 showers- one with my future mother-in-law's friends and a co-ed one with our friends. At both of these showers, the gifts were not personal for the bride, but were mostly things we had registered for.Susan My sister threw me a surprise bridal shower and I got lots of fun racey (and some obscene)lingerie. One of my favorite gifts, however, was a set of 3 beautiful silk covered padded hangers - something I would never buy for myself, but I have enjoyed for almost 15 (!) years. I have also seen pretty soaps, skin creams and other ''pamper yourself'' gifts that everyone likes go over very well.showered I think it's fine to buy something off the registry for the bride. At my shower, I was up to my ears in lingerie that I only wore on the honeymoon, so I much appreciated the more useful, less racy gifts. Or if you want to get something just for the bride, you could get something not quite as sexy as lingerie, like a cozy but cute bathrobe or pajamas. Good luck! First, check the invitation. Most showers have ''themes'' to which the gifts ideally will relate (for example, ''travel'' or ''kitchen''). You may even have been ''assigned'' a letter of the alphabet with which the name of your gift should start or a time of day that your gift would be used. Second, are you sure this is a shower for the bride only, or is it for the couple? Among my friends, ''co-ed'' showers are now the norm, and typical gifts include books, movies, games, wine, and tools, along with the more traditional dishes and towels. Finally, remember that even though things like mixing bowls and picture frames are for the couple rather than for just the bride, they are normal bridal shower gifts because traditionally housekeeping, decorating and entertaining were the province of women only. Brides who are traditionally minded enough that their friends give them girls-only showers don't mind the implications of receiving a frying pan as a bridal shower gift, and usually prefer traditional housewares-type gifts. Lingerie is not the expected gift unless the shower has a stated theme of lingerie or ''personal'' items (which could also include bath products and the like). Something relatively inexpensive from the couple's registry -- kitchen utensils, napkin rings, casual candlesticks -- is appropriate. More creative possibilities exist, but in the absence of a theme and given than you don't actually know the bride very well, that's what I would suggest giving.Holly I am of the mind that the best gifts for brides-to-be are ones that a)encourage stress reduction and/or b) celebrate the fact that she is still an autonomous person who will bring her best to a marriage when she can maintain a clear sense of her own identity. Okay, so what does that look like in gift form? What I would have appreciated is a gift certificate for a massage or facial and/or a book on personal finance geared toward women, married or no. I don't know the titles of any off hand, but I know there are some out there. signed,not all that comfy in lingerie anyway Hi Bobbie.I like to give gifts to the bride that will benefit both bride and groom since this is a way of respecting their new union together. Also, men don't have these type of parties, so it's kind of sad if the guys don't get any gifts at all. You could give lingere if it is tasteful, and not trashy (and this will benefit the groom as well as the bride.) The best kind of gifts I think are for the home, particularly nice gifts they can use and show off when entertaining, and tell their friends that you were the one with such nice taste that gave them such and such.Hope this helps.Best Regards!Tiffany I have been to countless bridal showers (including my own), and it seems to me that just about anything goes. Some people stick to gifts from the wedding registry. Others do give lingerie, ''racy'' and not. But I think the nicest gifts are ones that are personal to the bride-to-be: candles, bath lotions and potions, gift certificates for a facial or massage, photo albums, camping gear, books--you name it. The only thing I'd steer clear of is giving cash! At the most recent bridal shower I attended, I gave the bride-to-be a gift certificate to a local bookstore; she is an avid reader and I knew she'd appreciate the chance to buy books for her beach-vacation honeymoon. Have fun and don't stress too much about it.once a blushing bride, now a tired mom how about bed & breakfast trays ($12 at Target) and some of your favorite breakfast recipes (breads, smoothies, etc.). Ask the hostess where the bride is registered. If she is registered, she hasvery good idea of what she wants for a gift and I think you should get her agift from her list, even if her tastes don't reflect yours. If she is notregistered, then you may want to get her a massage certificate. I know thatwhen I was a bride, I would have loved that! Lisa Some brides want lingerie as gifts, but don't get any if you're not comfortable with it! Bridal shower gifts are often more modest versions of wedding gifts. You could find out where the couple is registered from whomever is hosting the shower and choose something in your price range. If she's not registered or everything is out of your price range, simple home items -- think hostess gift -- are good bets. Picture frames are good shower gifts. If you want to get something just for the bride, you could get aromatherapy bath items since planning and preparing for a wedding is stressful though joyous, and I think everyone could use some pampering.-been to all types of bridal showers If the bride is registered, buy her something from the registery so you know you're getting her something the couple absolutely wants. It's tough to buy lingerie unless you really know her (size wise and raciness factored in!) Otherwise, I have gotten gift certificates for a massage, or any sort of spa treatment (manicure, pedicure, facial etc) because these are things anyone LOVES to receive. It also a great way to fit in time for themselves before their 'big' day! You can try Claremont, Nordstrom, LaBelle. If the cost is too much for a package, just give her a gift certificate that she can supplement; I'm sure she'll love/appreciate it. eileen Hi-Buy something that she will enjoy over the honeymoon. My hubby and I had a destintation wedding in Maui and one of my girlfriends bought me a nifty Hawaiian purse full of fun stuff: designer sunblock, sunglasses, evian spritz water, cheesy magzines, lip blam, scarf, aloe vera, etc. It was completely unique and I used everything. I am a bit of a penny-pincher so it was fun to get ''girlie'' stuff. :) Deniene Unless it's a themed shower, I typically give one of threepresents.... A ''breakfast'' basket... Muffin tins, a breakfast cookbook andmaybe a coffee pot Christmas Ornaments (obviously, for Christians) Baking trays, cookie cutters and a rolling pin. I sometimesinclude a good recipe for cookies. None of these are fabulously expensive, and they are alwayshappily received. anon I would not assume that the bride wants anything ''racy''...plus that's too intimate of an item. I would suggest PJ's from Macy's by ''French Jenny''. They're cute but not frompy. Also, http://www.flowerslippers.com/ sell super cute slippers that my attendants loved!!wfp The bride is almost certainly registered somewhere and the person who is organizing the shower should know where. I think the most traditional gifts are the kitchenware/cooking ones --the shower organizer should be able to point you in the direction of the gifts the bride would most welcomeanon I recently discovered what I think is a good bridal shower gift: cookbooks. I've been semi-seriously into cooking for 20+ years, and if there's one thing I know it's a good cookbook! FYI, my current favorites are ''The Best Recipe'' by the staff of Cooks' Ilustrated magazine, and the Bruce Aidells & Denis Kelly book on meat (I think it's something like ''The Complete Guide to Meat''). Both are really outstanding. The Cooks Illustrated folks take a scientific approach to recipe development: they read as many recipes as they can find, extract what seem to be the key variables, then experiment until they get something they think is the best. Aidells and Kelly not only give delicious recipes, but their stories of travels far and wide searching for great meals are lots of fun to read. Makes me almost feel sorry for vegetarians!Kathy She may have already registered for her wedding find out where and buy something off the registery- that way you know it's soemthing she wants. Or go for something simple like a nice leatherbound photo album for the wedding or shower. Film for the honeymoon. One fun thing to do is to make a bridal survival basket: you can keep it high brow or make it funny- it can include things you always need at the wedding- bobby pins, safety pins, extra pair of hose, hair spray, clear nail polish, lotion, aspirin, slippers for when those wedding shoes that were oh so cute don't feel so cute anymore, etc you get the picture. Just some thoughts. Have fun.Juliette As a recent bride, I loved getting gift certificates to local spas, for facials and manicures, etc. I think that even if the bride in question normally doesn't do these things, the first time is always fun! I was never into this, but once I did it, I understood why so many women love it. You can also get gift certificates to hot tub/sauna places (the one in Albany is nice) - this is something the couple can share. I also enjoyed getting gift certificates to nice restaurants. The memories from these occasions last as long, if not longer than, as any other ''tangible'' gift.anon Cookbooks are always welcome, as some are coffee table books in addition to being useful tools. I have really enjoyed the books by Nigella Lawson (Nigella Bites, Forever Summer, and How to Be a Domestic Goddess) as they are often doable, and accompanied by intersting stories about the food. Also books by Patricia Wells. I recently went to a bridal shower where the theme was ''Simplicity'' and asked us to bring the single most useful kitchen or other tool we had in our kitchen, along with a simple recipe. A NYT article proclaimed the 3 essentials of the kitchen as this: ''As the business of the vanity kitchen boomed, though, threesmall new tools - two tools and a mat, actually - werepicked up by cooks. You may own one or all of them: theMicroplane zester, the OXO vegetable peeler and the Silpatmat. None is particularly attractive. All are simple yetexceptional workhorses, and deserve to be regarded as newclassics of the modern kitchen - less flashy than theCuisinart, perhaps, but just as impossible to live without.Each has not only subtly and stealthily improved manycooks' lives, but changed what people cook as well. '' (June 4 NYT, A Hesser). Tongs, and an apple corer were also big hits at the bridal shower. I.e. useful, but perhaps esoteric items you would never buy for yourself. Email me if you'd like the full article. Good luck!ShahanaSimple but useful What you give at a shower can varry quite a bit. Some bridal showers have a theme and you buy gifts to go with the theme ie: lingere, kitchen, camping, etc. If it is a theme shower the hostess mentions that in the invitation. Otherwise, it depends on your relationship with the bride and your comfort level. Personally, I only have ever bought lingere for very close friends (room-mate, women I have known since childhood, if I had a sister... etc.) since size and style are hard to know for others. Other gift ideas: bubble bath/beads/lotions, candles and holders, hobby items (like cookie cutters and a jar if the bride or couple likes to bake). Cookbooks, kitchenware and linens are traditional gift items for a bridal shower. Also, you can purchase anything off the bridal registry for the shower as well. Rose Home | Reviews | Advice | Members | Post a Message Join BPN | Help | What's New | Search Please send questions and comments to Berkeley Parents Network . Last updated: Sep 14, 2003 © 1996-2005 Berkeley Parents Network The opinions and statements expressed on this website are those of parents who subscribe to the Berkeley Parents Network . Please see our Disclaimer for details.